Mr Ridiculous - By Andy West © 1997
Ridiculous is a naughty man, a fat and bald and shorty man
I think he lives in a caravan but I’m not quite sure,
He went to university, he teaches in a nursery,
I’m sure that he’d be cursing me if he could hear me now.
Devious wants anything to undermine the balancing
He’ll sell you any sedative that you’d care to name,
Whether it’s up, down or sideways, there’s something for all tastes,
Heaven or hells gates, no one really knows.
What they need is a, kicking outside.
Obvious shouts obscenities and swears he knows the remedy
But ask him if he’s ready and you’ll get a nervous smile,
A hundred good excuses or the “Proper way to do things.”
Turn around a second and he’s run away a mile.
Devious I’m telling you, has studied all the avenues
On how he’s gonna run you through then have a nice day.
Obvious can’t take no more, Ridiculous is on the floor,
They ended up in hospital and weren’t seen again.
What they need is a jolly good kicking outside.