upper weardale show, august 26, 2006
speckled jim flies a lap of honour
then swoops with arrogance
into a ford transit van
having beaten the greyhound in a fair contest
little girls tappity tap in their clogs
while thelwell ponies
bearing hacking jacketed moppets
parade past, led by serious women
whippet 'gainst shi tzu;
swifty is fleetest of foot, no question
but fluffy takes short cut and wins
(we know it's a fix, but who cares)
remember cnut? (that's ker noot)
he of holding back waves fame?
lesser known is his love of greyhounds
want one? hard luck
capital offense, unless you're royalty
so poachers slyly interbred
creating lurchers, hairy beasts
just as quick, but disguised
that sounds like the poachers interbred
i meant the dogs
(i love this show)
stanhope silver band plays on
while a barn owl demonstrates silence
farmers with fat fingers ignore earnest types
re-building a dry stone wall
tups with enormous bollocks look bored
and a bloodhound cocks his leg
to pee on his master's white trousers
upper weardale show, august 26, 2006
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The comedy in this poem is brilliant Delph
I could hear a regional news reporter reading it to camera with cut-to's of the events.
Well played mate ...
I could hear a regional news reporter reading it to camera with cut-to's of the events.
Well played mate ...
Louis P. Burns aka Lugh
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Administrator, editor & owner of the Sensitize © online community of forums and domain for artists, e-poets, filmmakers, media/music producers and writers working through here. To buy the Kindle book of Illustrated Poetry, Sensitize © - Volume One / Poems that could be Films if they were Funded by myself with illustrations by Welsh filmmaker and graphic artist; Norris Nuvo click here for N. Ireland and UK sales. If purchasing in the U.S.A. or internationally then please click here.
ASIN B00L1RS0UI
My writing is not covered by Creative Commons policy and may not be republished without permission. All rights reserved. All Sensitize © Arts sponsorship donations and postal inquiries to:
Louis P. Burns
42 Farland Way
DERRY
N. Ireland.
BT48 0RS
Telephone (UK): 028 71219225
Click here to Join Sensitize © Arts via Facebook or to contact the site owner: Louis P. Burns aka Lugh with any forum hosting or site related inquiries.
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I got as far as "Speckled Jim" before I shot tea out of my nose. It was that scene in Blackadder IV which spawned it and it became the nickname for "Speckled Hen" beer amongst my close friends.
Many a crazy night was had under the influence of "Jim", including the punt related incident in Cambridge (for which the police never identified us).
Ahhh. Happy days.
You're a very rude lady by the way. Which is cool.
Many a crazy night was had under the influence of "Jim", including the punt related incident in Cambridge (for which the police never identified us).
Ahhh. Happy days.
You're a very rude lady by the way. Which is cool.
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